Fixing a disconnect...

Okay... so honestly, I don't know what I was thinking about when I was writing this post. It's 12/27 - I have 497 posts... I'm trying to get to 500...

That's when I noticed that several were in "draft form" - so, what I'm trying to do now is wrap up and finish those items so I can get 500 the honest way.

So... I was trying to fix some disconnect, and I don't know what it was.

Woooooow.... but, I blogged! That's the good part!

Follow the rules...

When it comes to dating, I have rules. One very important rule is:

Don't chase... it makes you look desperate.

This is important for a few reasons.

1) If you chase, you look desperate. Looking desperate is very unattractive.

2) If you chase, you look a little unstable. If you want someone too much, then you seem insecure.

When approaching someone, you want to be confident and a high value person. Get it?

This past week I have been preaching this to a friend of mine that has been chasing this guy like a hungry lost puppy.

Well I had a chance to test the theory. I met ts travel nurse . Actually I've known her for about a year. She's getting ready to come from the east coast to the west coast and "invited herself" to stop by for a weekend, since we've been hitting it off so well on the phone.

Well, she is suppose to come to town tonight and last night - yesterday - was the the first day that I didn't get her standard good morning message to me: good morning sweet cheeks.

I sent her a good morning message... no reply.

Around noon I sent her a joking message about her going away party.

Around 7pm I called to check in on her...

I shouldn't have made that phone call.

I should not have made that phone call.

I should not have made that phone call.

Well... here's the game plan... I am not going to call her again. Even if I never hear from her again.

The object is also not to appear desperate.

As much as I hate games, I know that I cannot answer her phone call when... if... she calls the first time. I have got to let it go to voice mail.

If she texts, I can't reply for about an hour.

It SUCKS...

But this year, I am following new rules:

• value yourself

Yeah, keep it simple...

Wish me luck.

Settling

I've spent some time thinking about it... thus the reason that I'm blogging again.

I have really high standards. Honestly I do.

The problem is, it gets lonely waiting for the person that I'm looking for, so I get sidetracked by people that are mildly interesting to me and I make compromises that I wouldn't ordinarily take.

The result is that I end up with women who end up being insecure because they can't see what I see in them, and they become slightly more than insecure.

So... I write this as a reminder... if I'm looking for someone that's well balanced, gainfully employed, and with a strong vision of how to live life, I need to wait until I find her, and not just migrate to the first reasonably cute person that seems half way together.

So... a word to myself...

Be patient.

Love,

Me

Where is love...

Sometimes, I get the feeling that there is someone out there for everyone... except for me.

I see beautiful women with these incredibly hideous looking guys that have no personality, no money, no intelligence, and I'm like REALLY?

REALLY?

You're kidding, right?

Sometimes it's like it's a cruel joke that the universe is playing with me.

I always end up as the friend, or the confidante and I'm not quite sure why. What I do know is that I collect attractive friends like my mailbox collects junk mail... I show up and they're just there...

So, now I'm curious.

If women say they want to date their best friend... and I end up being their best friend... Ohhhh, I don't know, the whole thing makes my head hurt.

I'm going back to bed.

I swear!!!

Sometimes I feel like someone has held me down and scribbled loser on my forehead.

I am a reasonably attractive guy. I take care of myself... I'm getting back into shape. I'm going to have 6 pack abs again.

I'm successful in my job, I have relatively no baggage, and I am a gem of a guy based upon the number of women that are quick to claim me as their friend and confidante.

Lately? I have been attracting a new type of woman.

Women who are currently or have in the past been "knocked up" by a crack head. Yes... a real, honest to goodness crack addict.

Or, have 3 kids by 3 different "baby daddy's."

They CLING to me, regardless of how I run...

It's only partially frustrating.

Where are the normal women?

And why won't they date me?

Hello... my name is...

When ever I go through the whole break up thing I always take a moment to blog and to figure things out.

Here's what I've figured out...

When it comes to dating, I'm relatively insecure.

Sad, but true.

I tend to date people who are interested in me and not people that I'm truly interested in. And that's just because they are willing to spend time with me.

Many of times, these people have issues and problems that I'm willing to overlook at first. Maybe it's loneliness, more than likely, it's my own insecurity - that I can't really do better.

Inevitably, what happens is we start dating, the "honeymoon" phase is gone, and I begin to see how messed up their lives truly are... I panic and want to run.

I am not saying that I'm perfect. I know I'm not. I have my own issues, but I tend to run from the following things:

• Women who want to move in too quickly
• Women who want me to cut off all my old friends
• Women who are too attached to their ex's emotionally
• Women who want me to change into what THEY want me to be

So... now I'm concentrating on me... and correcting this little known flaw.

I can be your friend... I can be your rock... I can't be your boyfriend AND rock.